Thankful Thanksgiving Thursday.

I am Thankful for our beautiful family. My children who have made me grow and will continue to do so until I die. I am thankful for my husband who makes me grow and has been willing to grow so much himself. I am thankful for a marriage that makes God the center of it, for children who know that God's perfect love is enough but who seem to let us attempt that level just the same, who let us kiss their boo-boo's, hold their hands, snuggle in bed with them, tickle them, read to them, discipline them, correct them, train them, and make mistakes with them. They seem to love us anyway. I am thankful for that.

I am thankful for parents who try. Parents who try to be better, try to change all the time. Parents who are unwilling to say, "what you see is what you get". Instead, they say "how can I be better?" Parents of crying infants, tantruming toddlers, inquisitive children, angry teenagers, and independent adults. I am thankful for all you parents who try, who stretch yourselves over and over again. I am thankful for my parents. I am thankful for Steve's parents. I am thankful for their parents.

I am thankful to the most forgiving Lord that I get the pleasure to love and ask for help every day. I am thankful for His guidance, His wisdom, His providence, His leadership, and His strength. I am thankful to His beautiful Mother for being the perfect example of what it means to just shut up and say "yes". Of what it means to be a wife who is willing to be supportive and get on the back of a donkey when she's NINE MONTHS pregnant and ride in the freezing cold for hours because she was just willing to trust. I am thankful for the example and the self sacrifice for a greater good.

I am thankful for food in the kitchen, a warm bed, clothing for my children, education, animals, trees, transportation, and the magic of the holidays and the miracles of christmastime.

I am also thankful for a certain political party who, it has just come to my attention, give four times as much as their opponents. They give four times more money, more time, and more donations. They even give more blood. Thank you, fellow Americans. I am thankful for democracy.

I am thankful for today. Today is one more day I get to spend loving my children and Steve with an imperfect love, but an intense love nonetheless. One more day I get to wake up and look at sunshine, feel excitement, joy, anxiety, and exhaustion. All are feelings which I don't take for granted because they mean I am alive and I am apart of something greater than me.

Update.

So, the prep work I have done today is beyond expectation. I am so happy to have most all of it done already.

Already finished and to be thrown in the oven for heating tomorrow: Pesto and artichoke baked brie in puffed pastry, balsamic marinated bacon wrapped shrimp, stuffing, homemade cranberry chutney, mashed potato casserole, sauteed sweet potatoes with roasted pecans and brown sugar glaze, Roasted vegetables with sharp cheddar peppered Dijon sauce, and pumpkin flan. Oh, yeah. The turkey. I have to be honest here and say that the turkey is my LEAST favorite part of Thanksgiving. What gives? It's just so....poultryesque.

I even managed to stop three different times and read stories about the first Thanksgiving with the kids.

Oh, and my biggest accomplishment of my only half-over day? I haven't yelled ONCE.

Thank you. Thank you. No applause please.

I said, stop it!

Sparked by a recent post by an awesome blogger, my new resolution is to stop yelling. I am not expecting 100% perfect adherence, but I am going to make a concerted effort ALL DAY LONG.

With a stubborn and precocious two year old, over excited and hypersensitive four year old, and a baby who whines from 3-5pm, I have my work cut out for me....in vivid color.

Here goes nothing...

Here we go!

We are showing our house to some prospective buyers tomorrow. Is it too late to paint? Seriously. We are going to do some painting tonight. That's how we roll. Let's just say a small prayer that we are able to rid the house of too many paint smells. Ew.

I am cooking Thanksgiving dinner at my house this year. I decided that, in an effort to thwart any and all vomiting while we have guests here, I am going to do as much prep work as I can ahead of time. Good idea? I think so. Frankly, the thought of the blended smells of turkey, pumpkin, garlic, cranberries, rosemary, and broccoli conjures lamentations of a violent vomiting episode. Whoa. I better stop writing about food.

I have successfully figured out that the more tired I am, the worse the heaving is in the morning. If I can be sure to get a good nights rest, I can be feeling good enough to eat something by 9 or so. After going to a football game on Saturday and being out way too late, I couldn't eat a thing until about 2:30. I did take the Eucharist at Mass, thinking that if anything would heal me, that'd do it. Our priest leaned in, gave me the host, and whispered, " God bless you, Nicole". I cried. I know I'm hormonal but, come on, how beautiful was that?

The sweetest thing I heard yesterday was from Paxton. "Mommy, I'm excited to go to Jesus' house!" (And I don't mind admitting that, in my head, I was patting myself on the back all the way to the car.)

Clarification

Regarding yesterday's post; my intention was for you to read the post and then to further read about 20 or so of the replies to the post, mainly to get an idea of what people were saying about the differences between Quiverfull and NFP.

Sorry for making you think that Steve and I were on board with the idea of not having any sort of awareness of our bodies. Yikes. I think that's why God gave us "cycles" and tangible signs of fertility. He wants us to be good stewards of the gifts which He gives, in every area.

As a good blogger friend of mine said, "God's will wins out every time". Our lives and our family size will be exactly what it should be, as long as we are open to what God wants for and expects from us.

I just wanted to see what you folks thought as well.

Quiverfull vs. NFP

Amy's post was just too good not to link to today. This is a highly (unnecessarily) controversial topic.

Where do you think Steve and I stand?

Thankful Thursdays

First, thank you Melissa for inspiring this.

Oftentimes it's hard to remind myself to really stop and thank God for His providence. For His undying love for me and my family, our marriage. For Team Prentice. I don't even have to think for a second about how we are blessed because it's just so evident.

I am thankful for my four miracles, three with names so far. I am thankful for an amazing husband who, to copy Melissa's sentiment, I don't deserve. I am thankful for some incredibly deep, supportive, enriching friendships. Women-friendships and especially couple-friendships. I am thankful for newfound blogger friends, who I have more in common with than anyone I know.

I can recall one night, while lying in bed, Steve and I both crying, praying that God please just fill our lives with some couple friends who He knew would help us along the path to which He was calling us. He did. And now we have trouble spending enough time with ALL of them.

I am thankful for parents, grandparents, and pets. I am thankful for Fall, Winter coats and mittens, and heat. I am thankful for books, sleeping babies, and tea.

I am thankful that I get to be home and watch my life unfold before my eyes. Children grow, houses change, and marriages grow stronger. And that's just what we can see. God is so good. His providence is amazing. What more could He have in store?

Finally, a reason.

Steve is in Seattle again for a few days. I am here. I am a teeny bit scared. No, not of handling the kids by myself. I am scared that they might need to eat before 11am. I am highly tempted to have a veritable smorgasbord laid out all over our dining room table, of non-perishable snack foods, full of transfats and completely devoid of any nutritional value. Ah....a girl can dream.

So, I think I will be gagging my way through breakfast preparation over the next couple days.

Paxton has preschool today and then I am off to volunteer for a few hours. Grammy is meeting me there and taking the kids out to lunch. That will be SO nice. We are getting ready to move our office into a new building and I am sure there will be permanent markers, tape, scissors and big boxes everywhere. That would spell WAY too much fun for little hands trying to "help" Mommy.

In other news, Shepherd is aggressively cutting his top two teeth. They are almost in. Maybe one more day. In the meantime, he seems to be enjoying biting everything .....and everybody. Hard.

How does one go about stopping an 11 month old from biting? An old pediatrician my parents used to see when we were little would say, "just bite him back.". Um, I think, for today, I'll just let that little gem of wisdom pass me by. That could explain SO much about why I have poor math skills and have a tendency to be controlling. My parents probably bit me.*




*probably not, but it sure makes for a good excuse for any and all dysfunction doesn't it?

Ideas?

Anyone have any ideas what to do with a 4 1/2 year old suffering ennui, having given up naps six months ago? I can only let him play with knives for so long.

Please keep in mind when offering suggestions that EVERYONE else in the house, except Daddy, is trying to nap. :)

Bring it on.

The sickness has officially hit. It has been progressing for a few days now but this morning was when I knew for sure that it was here.

I was reading a news site. One of the stories titled, "Burger King Manager Shoots Teen" sent me running to the toilet. Just looking at the words Burger King. That was enough. Smells always get me. But, sometimes it seems just the word has the power to conjure a smell.

I haven't worn perfume since 2001. I still can't think about a twinkie without gagging (bad experience in 5th grade). So...I think it's psychological for me. Yes, that's what it is. I am a tiny bit crazy. It's all in my head. I should just snap out of it!

In the mean time, Steve and the kids are on their own for breakfast for a while. Steve asked me this morning to buy some "good cereal". Apparently, the kids weren't really digging my Fiber One and Shredded Wheat options. We've never really been a cereal family but, I think with pregnancy #4 we might have to become one.

Vomiting from hormones indicating an actively growing, healthy baby? Bring it on.

Spain.

We were invited to some friends' house tonight for some tapas. Yum. I made flan because, really, what would go better with tapas?

It will feel SO good to get out with some big people--other couples. Adult conversation, laughter and maybe even a card game or two. This tired couple has needed friend time.

...or a trip to Spain. Ahh....someday. We'll just settle for tapas tonight.

Lazy days

Daddy is gone today. He had to be in Seattle all day to work. So, naturally, the kids and I are still in our pajamas. We have played, watched Cars (the best movie ever!), and made sandwiches together. I have no plans for us to move from our pajamas to regular clothes ANY time soon. That's just the way it is.

Don't be misled. It's not really just because Steve is gone that we are living like this. Although, it does make it even more justifiable. No, we are in our pajamas because we have been since Saturday night, after the auction. With the exception of getting dressed for Mass on Sunday and my volunteer work yesterday, we have not even been out. We're not sick. We're not tired. We're just.....relaxing. I should clarify that Paxton has been getting dressed for Preschool. That seemed important.

I haven't done it in about three months. I'm doing it now. This post auction and election relaxation feels pretty darn nice.

The auction went SO well. My mother created a gorgeous charcoal drawing of our Queen of Peace that fetched $1,700. Steve's mom made a beautiful Noah's Ark quilt using the 4-year old preschoolers handprints to create the animals which also fetched $1,700. Our Mediterranean dinner went twice for $1,800. So, all in all, Team Prentice and family did pretty well for this little school. The decorations turned out really well and a lot of people commented that it was much more elegant this year than in years past. It was a ton of work, I learned a lot about myself, I am glad I have that experience under my belt, and I can now say with complete certainty, I am never doing it again. My parents used to use the saying, "there are too many chiefs and not enough Indians". I don't think I need to expand.

I am disappointed, to say the least, in South Dakota. Not shocked, but disappointed. I really am. I was really thinking something else might happen there. I am really trying to stay upbeat and be grateful that an abortion ban was even ON the ballot. Baby steps. Pun completely intended.

In my laziness this week I also finished my Uncle Jim's new book. It's amazing. I HIGHLY recommend it. Fair Play: The Moral Dilemmas of Spying. Buy it. Check it out. Read it. (Melissa, I bet Darren would LOVE this book). His full name is James M. Olson. He's the former Chief of CIA Counterintelligence and is a current professor at George Bush School of Government and Public Service at Texas A&M University. He collaborates with some pretty amazing sources in this book and talks about real life experiences that he had while in the field. I am so proud of him and proud to know and love him. He embodies the true meaning of patriotism.

Does anyone find that the more times you are pregnant, the more you forget what's supposed to be happening at different points or even how far along you are? When I was pregnant with Paxton, every day felt like an eternity waiting for this new, beautiful someone to enter our lives. This time around? I am finding myself wishing I could just be pregnant a few more months. There is so much to do and so little time!

Now I think it's time to go make some cookies. In our pajamas.

South Dakota.

Please, please, please stop what you are doing a few times throughout the day today. Stop and say a prayer for South Dakota and their elections.

God willing, this could change the course of history.

(More about the auction later. It was a huge success and I feel so good about it.)

Death and tax write-offs. The only sure things.

Okay. The auction that we have been working feverishly on is just two days away. My precious family has sacrificed SO much time with me in the last two weeks. It is crunch time. I will let you know how it turns out. God willing, it will be a huge success and all will attend feeling inspired to give.

Who are you praying for today, this All Souls Day?

Those on my list? My brother, grandpa, nana, great grandmas, great uncle, and Steve's grandma. May Christ's Peace comfort them and bring them home. May they enter into the gates having fulfilled their respective missions, those chosen spefically for them by Our Father. May we be aspiring to do the same this very moment here on earth. Life on earth is so short compared to eternity. As one of my favorite priests says, "We're all terminal". Are we doing everything we can to prepare?

Fundraisers and death. I am not sure of the parallel yet, but stay tuned.

Fun flavors.

How do you know when you're pregnant?

Your peanut butter toast has the after-taste of sushi nori.

Okay....

How sad is it that the only decent picture I have of myself is of about seven months ago? Man, I hate having my picture taken!

So, do I look like a 'Nicole'? Cuz that's what I am. A 'Nicole'.

Nicknames that have been given me by various family members: "Colie", "Coleslaw", "Missy", "Slaw" and "Dano"(what Steve calls me when he's upset with me. It's my maiden name. Yeah, don't think for a second that there was ANY coach in Junior High or High School that didn't LOVE the phrase "Book em' Dano!" I'm not even old enough to be familiar with that show!)

Now, if you'll please just stick with Headstrong or HWWTMBW. It's SO much more mysterious and, frankly, I could use a little mystery.

I live in a house where 'full disclosure' is commonplace. The kind of 'full disclosure' where, at Mass, when the priest asks my daughter in front of the whole parish if she prays to God regularly she replies with, "Um, I have Dora sunglasses!" and then she runs back to the pew and loudly proclaims (about four times), "Dad, I have to go poop!" The kind of 'full disclosure' where my son sadly says to my husband, "Dad, I just wish I had a vagina like Ella" and my husband replies with, "No, Paxton, you don't. They're way too much maintenence."

My name is Nicole and this is my life.

Prepare for the outing.

So....I have inadvertently created mystery. I never really intended to. It just happened. I am an enigma. Complex and deep. Okay, not really. I just never put my name into my profile.

Anyway, it has come to my attention that only a few of you know my real name. So, I thought we'd do something fun. I'm going to let you guess. What do YOU think my name is?


Happy guessing!

Playing fair.

Since discovering three days ago that Team Prentice will be adding a new member (YAY!!!) we have had a ton of positive remarks, well wishes, and congratulations.

There are those few select people however who choose to...eh hem....rain on our procreational parade.

"What?!" "How is that even possible?!" "How many kids are you going to have?!" "How can you afford all those kids?". I am sure you're familiar enough with questions like these, so I'll spare you any more.

This makes me wonder. It makes me wonder what it is exactly that people think children 'need'. I think I have summed up a short list of general 'needs' that MANY people think children have, with whom, for the most part, I disagree wholeheartedly.

Children need: lots of toys, lots of new clothes (not those disgusting hand-me-downs), Disneyland, McDonalds, video games, plenty of time to just play and not be bothered with learning manners, helping mom and dad, or taking care of their things.

When they're older, children need: a new car, immediately after getting their license, plenty of time to just play and not be bothered with practicing good manners, helping their parents, or taking care of their things. They need video games, lots of new clothes, and their own room. They always need to have their own room and, frankly, to make a child 'share' a room is almost enough reason to call CPS. Children definitely need their entire education paid for so they don't have to be bothered--even if they want to go to medical school. Really. God forbid they have student loans, aka a beautiful reminder every day that the privilege of an education isn't free and is totally worth working for.

So, in the most loving and non-judgmental way that I can, I am going to tell you a little about our philosophy.

Having children and having money should never HAVE to go hand in hand. Period. Our children love rolling around in grass just as much as they love rolling around in the ball-pit at IKEA. Our children love helping me make homemade cookies with ingredients we already have just as much as they love special trips to Starbucks for a chocolate chunk cookie. Our children look so forward to birthdays mostly for all the singing, clapping and cake. The presents are a bonus. How many they get doesn't matter at all. Our children love listening to books on tape from the library and sitting in our laps while we read to them just as much as they love playing games on the computer and watching movies. Our boys are so adorable when they wake up together and happy, after having just slept in the SAME ROOM. Shepherd looks at Paxton through the slats of his crib and sees love. He sees his beautiful and gentle brother looking back at him from his little twin bed, just four feet away. It is precious and it's a little thing we like to call 'sharing'.

Our children love our unglamorous white mini-van with fishy crackers shoved down in the seatbelt cracks just as much as they love Noni's Mercedes, Popi's Infinity, and Grandma and Grandma's farm toys like the Toro Twister and big tractor. They don't 'need' flash. A car is a car, heated seats or not.

I posted a month or so ago about what I wanted for my children. I understand some parents' fear. I really do. They can't even imagine what they would do without all the stuff to which they have become accustomed. They are so scared about what it would do to their children if they didn't have a trampoline, a dvd player in their room, or trips to Disneyland at least once every three years. They are scared because that's what they grew up with. That's what their parents gave them. How could any child have a happy childhood with any less?

Our children need us. Our children need God. Our children need structure, time to play, time to learn, and time to grow. They need to be able to learn from their mistakes, to not take each other for granted and to stand up for those who are weaker than they. Our children need love, a mom and dad who love each other and make time for each other. Our children need parents who aren't afraid to tackle problems head-on, and who talk to them when there's a problem. Our children need sit-down, homecooked meals. Our children need to be read to, listened to, and tended to. Our children need to know that they are a part of a team. A team goes nowhere with only one player. It just can't. All players must work together and look out for each other, else the team will not succeed. We don't have to always win. Not at all. Sometimes we will, in fact, fail. But we do have to play fair.

And learning how to play fair has nothing to do with iPods, cell phones, or Abercrombie and Fitch.

I should have known.

I should have read the Magnificat this morning. I should have read Psalm 145 and the reflection before it. I should have thought to do it right after I got on my knees and thanked God for His amazing Providence, for His beautiful gift to this family, yet again.

Here is what it said:

"It's a common mistake to think that God's 'works' and 'mighty deeds' are told only in Scripture. Every person's life is God's work of art, an expression of His creative love, His goodness, His compassion. A little thought can personalize this psalm for everyone who prays it."

I will give you glory, O God my King,
I will bless your name for ever.

I will bless you day after day
and praise your name for ever.
The Lord is great, highly to be praised,
His greatness cannot be measured.

Age to age shall proclaim Your works,
shall declare Your mighty deeds,
shall speak of Your splendor and Glory,
tell the tale of Your wonderful works.

......

Let me speak the praise of the Lord,
let all mankind bless His Holy Name
for ever, for ages unending.

Glory to the Father, to the Son, and to the Holy Spirit.

Regarding Random Fact #3

Apparently, that IS what God wanted for us.

And he wanted it right now.

Go Team Prentice!

Ten Random Facts Meme

I was tagged by Melissa for this fun little diddy.

1) I hate fruit on meat. Any fruit. Any meat. They are NEVER meant to go together.

2)I NEVER do it, but I know how to crochet.

3)I want a lot more children. I hope that's what God wants for me too.

4)Before choosing Psychology, I was a Pre-Med major. WAY too much schooling and chemistry and math. Imagine that.

5)Steve and I use a secret hand code when we are at a function and we want the other to know that we are ready to leave.

6)I am painfully uncomfortable with unresolved confict. It affects my sleep, my appetite, and my attention span.

7)I never took the SAT's. (I took the ACT)

8) I can't rollerblade, iceskate, or slalom ski. Are you noticing a pattern?

9) I can't sleep on my stomach. I can't sleep on my back. I can't sleep on my left side. I use three pillows when I sleep. And I drool.

10) If I wear color, I feel like an Easter Egg.

"Oh, okay."

Ella: (whimpering and rubbing her elbow)

Me: Oh, honey, what happened?

Ella: **Sob** I just fell!

Me: What happened?

Ella: I was just looking down at my feet, because they are beautiful, and then I fell!

Me: Oh, (trying to hold in laughter) okay, are you okay now?

Ella: *sniff, sniff* Yeah.


Instilling humility. One day at a time.

Slow on the uptake.

Steve just gave me a lesson on 'linking'. It was good. Well, he was good. I was a little slow on the uptake. So...here's my first attempt.

Check out this kickin' pumpkin carving (which was also on Danielle Bean's blog). This one is my favorite!

Woohoo! It worked. Yay me!

(Apparently, having a spouse who is a software engineer doesn't necessarily guarantee YOU any more intelligence or aptitude.)

Predilections.

Paxton: Hey guys, I'm getting hungry (right before bed).

Me: Hmmm.

Paxton: Hmmm, what should I eat that won't give me cavities? *gasps* I know! Applesauce! Will that give me cavities?

Me: Well, that kind has sugar in it. How about carrots?

Paxton: Okay!!

Again, I am loving having a child that equates fruit with candy and vegetables with cheese. Yesterday he ate an entire raw green pepper while sitting on the counter, watching me stuff and cook some.

God is good.

Now on to Princess Ella, who prefers we put tabasco on things.

Long overdue.

I know, I know. It really seems as though I have dropped off the face of the planet, doesn't it? Well, I haven't. Not yet anyway. I have a few more things to delegate before I'm comfortable just doing crazy, unpredictable things like that.

Delegate. That's right. That is what I have learned to do over these last few weeks. Really. I have.

I was SO sick last week and I think something broke. I think that part of my brain that has always said 'you can do it', 'suck it up', 'get over it', 'offer it up' and the like, broke. That part that forces me to commit to doing things I have no business in my right mind committing to. It actually affects my inhibition. It must be somewhere near my hypothalamus.

Since my life threatening illness (overdramatization) of last week, things have changed. Yes, I am still a mother. I am still a wife. I am still a volunteer crisis pregnancy counselor, school board member, auction decoration chairwoman, and RCIA sponsor. I am still all of these things. But, I am now wearing a new hat.

My hat looks something like this; small enough that my view of the world is unobstructed. I can see things and people more clearly now, and I can see that my expectations of them and who they actually are might not always match up. And? And that's okay. My new hat is big enough to shade me from the harsh, blistering heat and fierce wind that threatens to throw me and the rest of "Team Prentice" off course.

So, what the hell does all that really mean? It just means that I can say "no" with a little more ease than I could before. I can't quite just say, "no", without having to do a little "padding" though. I haven't perfected that yet. Give me time. I'll get there. I can feel the calluses starting to form already. You know what I should pray for? That God will help me WANT to want to say 'no'. Right? Cuz I don't. Want to, that is. It's just getting to the point where my options are running out. There are only so many of me. And my children and husband aren't getting any younger. I can't imagine looking back at my life and thinking, "Man, I just wish I had volunteered more and worked more while the kids were little. We just spent way too much time together".

Now that the said life threating illness didn't take me out, I can focus my energy on helping the rest of my family muddle their way through it. So far, just Ella and Shepherd have had the respiratory and gagging problems. Looks like Steve and Paxton are next! Fun times, fun times.

Noni has been here for a couple days, as well. She went with me to the school to work on auction stuff last night and this afternoon she'll be helping the kids to carve pumpkins (that came from Grandma and Grandpa's garden!). I love that my children love their Grandparents like I loved mine. I love that I have allies in all of them, that they will back us up as parents but that they'll spin it in a way that convinces our children that the rules and regulations which are imposed on them "rock". I love that when Noni comes, slumber parties, cake eating, dressing up, reading and telling stories, and lots of singing and dancing are in order.

Noni is a little more lenient (okay A LOT more) with my children than I'd prefer at times. Though, so are Grammy, and Popi, and Grandma and Grandpa, and Grandma Great, and even Papa Joe at times. At the end of the day though, I know that they all know why we do what we do and say what we say to our children. I also know that it's an illness. It's a grandparent malady. A part of their brains are permanently destroyed. I am pretty sure it's close to the part of the brain that I was talking about earlier. This part of their brains, though, regulates the ability to say "no" specifically to grandchildren, to make their grandchildren eat sensibly, and to care about whether they look silly or not or have clean teeth. Those things being virtually immaterial to them. It's an illness. Do your parents have it? We should really think about setting up some sort of charity fund for them.

I digress. So, things are much better around here and my head is no longer in danger of spinning off of my neck. Life is good. My priorities are more in check. The auction is on the 4th of November, which also happens to be my mother's birthday, the day after my dad's girlfriend's birthday, and one of my best friend's birthday. Once those important things are over, I think I will breathe even easier. Either that or I'll just start obsessing about two of my childrens' birthdays in December, Thanksgiving, Christmas and New Years.

Okay, well, I might need a little more intervention than a week long sickness.

Sunday mornings...

I am finally feeling better. So much so, in fact, that I am baking scones on this beautiful Sunday morning. It feels so good to feel good again. Now I am fully armed to deal with the illness that is slowly but surely coursing through the veins of every other family member.

Another thing of beauty? Paxton got up and, first thing, put on his dress shirt and slacks saying, "I'm just going to look handsome for Jesus' house".

Just beautiful.

More later...

Day 4.

Yeah, that'd be me. Still sick.

On the upside, I'm no longer blowing brain matter out of my nostrils. Yay.

Stay tuned....

Yep,

still sick.

God's way...

of telling you to slow down a bit? To take it down a notch? Waking up with a head so congested it feels like it will explode at any moment.

Sick days and reading 'Cinderella' to my Princess Ella, in bed, all day long....or until I have to leave for more auction decorating tonight for three hours.

What an overcommitted, wicked web we weave.

Great minds think alike.

Talking to my mom this morning, who is, along with Steve's mom, busy working on a project to donate to the school for the auction:

Me: Mom, how's the charcoal drawing going?

Mom: Well, I'm having a hard time getting started. I just sort of keep circling the table, and making excuses to run back and forth to the art supply store. I just can't seem to get moving with it.

Me: Oh, mom, that's so sweet.

Mom: Yeah, 'sweet' in a retarded sort of way.

Two people and achy feet.

Today went well. I say 'well' with a bit of apprehension. I am tired. My feet hurt. I have been hungry and tired for about five hours now. I smell like asphalt.

I walked outside our local Family Planning for a total of about 7 hours today. Just paced. Back and forth, praying and talking.

Steve came and went, our director came and went, my dad came and went, and one more volunteer came and went. I only had to be alone for about 2 hours. It was a long two hours with Ella and Shepherd, but some of the most humbling two hours of my life. God and I had a good talk.

I will blog more about it later, after I've had time to process it and rest a bit.

On a really positive note, two people came over to talk to us, one a staff member and the other a passer-by. We reached two people today. How many do you think they'll reach?

The good life.....with a donkey and a refridgerator.

We are starting to plan for building again!

Steve has been busily making changes to our original design (of over a year ago) and I must say that I am starting to get really excited again. It really feels right this time and I ...eh hem.....have had to have a little attitude adjustment. Before, when we were planning the house, I got sort of OCD. I know, I know, hard to believe. Me? Obsessed or compulsive about something? It's so far off base it's hard to even imagine. Just try.

So, now that I decided to take a more Marian approach, things are going MUCH better. I am finding changes here and there to be fine, even, dare I say, great. I'm open to them all--well, I did have to veto someone's suggestion of having TWO refrigerators in the kitchen. That, quite honestly, seemed a bit excessive. I could see a mini fridge for all of our Schmidt, but to have a whole other full size refrigerator? Come on, now.

So...on with the house plans, and the three months that it take to get a permit to build in this county, and we'll be rockin'! Life is so good, so busy and so blessed. We really are truly blessed. It's really not fair. I don't think we have done anything to deserve all of the gifts God has given us. In fact, I can think of a few things I have done in my lifetime that make a good case for God to smite me.

So, in aspiring to take a more Marian approach in my life, I am leading the group (hopefully) of people who will be outside our local Family Planning clinic tomorrow. The American Life League and many bishops throughout the country have pushed for the first Monday in October to become the official Pro-Life Memorial Day, where we gather in silence to remember those lost to abortion and those mothers suffering the effects of abortion. Not a day to picket, or to be a loud presence at all. Just a day to wear red and gather outside these clinics. I sent out an email to about 30 people. I am a realist. I am fully aware that we'll be lucky if we get 10 people out there in total. But, we will trudge on--we'll trudge on for the 47,000,000 children we will never have the pleasure to know.

I'm not in the clouds. I know this is a really, really, really tough subject. It's tough to get people to even talk about, let alone stand outside a clinic. I truly don't expect everyone to feel excited about it or even just okay with it. My own husband seems really nervous. He has never done anything like this before and, frankly, I have only done it twice myself. But, I know that we can't grow toward God as long as everything always feels good and comfortable. We just can't. That's a relationship with God of our making, not of His. He wants us to stretch high, reach for Him. Reach higher than we think our arms can stretch. He'll meet us the rest of the way, easing the load somewhat, but we just can't ever stop reaching.

So, I am going to go now, get on the donkey that Joseph, I mean Steve, wants me to ride and prepare for an amazing life.

....a humble life, with only one refridgerator in the kitchen.

On my knees, in praise and thanks.

Last night, Mr. Bereit single handedly DOUBLED our funds raised from last year. He was amazing. I really would not do it justice to try to capture in words what he brought to our little pro-life community last night. I still feel a bit speechless.

I was motivated, moved, and humbled. It was a call to action. It was a call to step outside of our comfort zones. It's easy to write a check, or say a quick prayer and wash your hands. It is not easy to do what we should be doing, what we are called to do by the Good Shepherd Himself, to take care of His flock, those that are weaker and more vulnerable than we.

Our director, a board member and I got to have lunch with David before the banquet and talk with him a bit, asking him what we could do right here in our little community. He had some wonderful ideas that you will be hearing about here and there in the future as we start to implement them. :)

I was so happy last night to be surrounded by Catholics, Lutherans, Methodists, Baptists, Presbyterians, Mormons, and Christians; people who have different doctrines and don't always see eye to eye. But, all were people who know that this is the greatest American tragedy and, as my Uncle Jim (who was a spy for the CIA and worked directly with the Russian KGB) says, quite frankly, is a bigger threat than communism.

Crossroads slideshow

Steve and I are feverishly working to get the slideshow done for the banquet tomorrow night!

Some quotes that we are putting in it:


"This is what the LORD says: 'Stand at the crossroads and look; ask for the ancient paths, ask where the good way is, and walk in it, and you will find rest for your souls'".
Jeremiah 6:16


If it's not a baby, you're not pregnant.
Author unknown

"It is a povery to decide that a child must die so that you may live as you wish."
Mother Teresa


"Being pro-life doesn't save babies, acting pro-life does."
Dennis Green

And my personal favorite....


"Before I formed you in the womb I knew you, and before you were born I consecrated you. "
Jeremiah 1:5


On Friday, I'll post about how the banquet went. We have been gearing up for this fundraiser banquet for a while. My four hour shift today was a little on the stressful side, as we're coming down to the wire! Please pray for open hearts and open pocket books. This ministry is amazing and I have been so blessed to have been a part of it, to have been able to witness miracles, love, and transformation of hearts right before my eyes.

Cedar River Genocide....I mean, Clinic.

Shepherd and I got in the car at a little after seven o'clock this morning to drive about an hour a half away to an abortion clinic. We met about seven other Catholics and Protestants outside and prayed like nobody's business. So much so, in fact, that they didn't get any business the whole two hours we were there! I had Shepherd in the bjorn on the front of me, both of us carried a rosary in our hands. Some held signs. Beautiful, peaceful, pro-life signs. This was not a demonstration. This was just another Tuesday outside the clinic.

We were invited to do this by a woman who has been instrumental in the pro-life movement in Yakima. She is under the umbrella of 'Human Life' and has been doing this now for about six years. She tries to organize groups of Christians to go and pray on Tuesdays and Wednesdays. They just had a save last week. The girl came over to them and broke down crying. This woman, now a friend, held that girl and told her that God was here with her now. If she'd let Him, He would walk right alongside her and she would never have to be alone again.

How beautiful.

Our message is not one of hate. It is not one of judgement. It is not one of violence, revenge or wrath. It is a message of hope. Of love. Of forgiveness. A message of life and of Christ.

The fundraiser dinner for Crossroads is coming up on Thursday night. I have really struggled with feelings of resentment-- resentment about how many Catholics (and Christians) SAY they are pro-life, SAY they care, SAY that their hearts break about abortion, about the stopping of a beating heart, and yet they do nothing. They are not willing to take the time, not willing to look silly or feel embarrassed by standing on a sidewalk, attending a pro-life banquet dinner, or even to just stand up for what they 'believe in'. I don't expect people to slap bumper stickers all over their cars, or stand in the street with blow horns. I just expect that when they are asked how they feel about someone murdering an innocent, tiny life that God created, they say, "It's wrong. Period. Jesus said so. The end".

Well, and if I'm being honest, I expect them to do everything they realistically can to educate others and to serve Him. A girl can dream, can't she?

David Bereit http://www.davidbereit.com is coming to speak at our fundraiser dinner. I am SO excited. Excited to meet him and to seek his counsel about what I can do around here to make a difference. An army of one? I suppose that's all it takes, right?

A final note; I cannot imagine how it must have felt, for those employees to walk outside of the clinic this morning, cigarettes in hand, seeing these same sweet, non-violent, sign-holding retired people that they are used to seeing and then looking over to see a new face. One, young 27 year old mother, with her happy baby strapped to the front of her, smiling at them and secretly praying for the day that they are walking right alongside her, like Miss Norma McCorvey, aka Jane Roe.

God works miracles. Every. Single. Day.

well-rounded femininity

How do you know your beautiful daughter is going to grow up to be a nicely well-rounded young woman?

When, after being asked to go pick out her two favorite books, she proudly walks into the room with "Sleeping Beauty" and "Everybody Poops".

That's our girl.

Roasting swine and dancing evangelicals

We just got back from a pig roast at the school. Yeah, you read that right. A pig roast. We crazy folk out west do that sort of thing with swine. We dig a hole. We put a whole pig on a stick. Then? Then we set it on fire and eat it when it's muscle, fat and flesh start to fall off of it's body. Okay, so it's a tiny bit more refined than that, but not much.

This dinner was donated by one of our local chiropractors at last year's auction. He is Hawaiian and apparently they do this sort of thing all the time over there. It was actually quite fun and no one got to (had to) see the actual 'roasting process'. Praise God.

Also tonight, while dining on swine, one of our friends (who recently converted to Catholicism, after attending Princeton Theological Seminary to become a Protestant minister!) leaned over to me and said, "Hey, you know why evangelicals are so against pre-marital sex? It might lead to dancing."

Now that, my friends, was worth smelling singed and salted swine mixed with the yummy smells of an old school gymnasium.

No, you're not crazy.

Yes, I did blog about a touchy subject earlier today. You likely read it. You likely thought to yourself, "Whoa, that's some pretty pithy stuff."

Yeah, it was. Pithy. Full of Pithiness.

So, until I have had time to digest it more and pray on it EVEN MORE, I'll hold off on asking for input.

Stay tuned.....

Top Ten

10. The amount of times I picked something out of Shepherd's mouth today.

9. The times I check my blog to see if someone posted on it--just to have some human contact!

8. The daily occurrences of me having to break up fights between Paxton and Ella over who gets to open the door or sit on the toilet first.

7. The loads of laundry I did today.

6. The big glasses of ice water I have had today.

5. The weeks on my calendar that are booked SOLID.

4. The amount of dishtowels this family goes through in any given day.

3. The amount of people in my life that actually rsvp to ANYTHING.

2. The Hail Mary's we managed to get through successfully during our "family decade" this evening.

1. The amount of fabulous husbands I have....and always will.

My life is busy. My life is blessed. My life can be summed up in a top ten list.

Maiden Voyage Masterpieces

Disturbing P.C.

No, not a personal computer. I'm talking about political correctness. You know, that phenomenon where you have to pretend that there really isn't a HUGE PINK ELEPHANT POOPING IN YOUR LIVING ROOM?

This whole thing going on with the Muslims who are outraged at the Pope for quoting someone else is really disturbing me. It has been on my mind a lot lately. I guess to speak more generally, this whole notion of having to be "p.c." is bothering me. If some stereotypes aren't true, then how exactly is it that a person or a group can become stereotyped? And, why exactly should the Holy Father be apologizing again? I missed that. In this instance, it seems many of the people of Islam are retaliating by doing exactly what it is that they were offended by being associated with just a week ago.

Disturbing.

My Aunt Meredith has this wonderful saying I have heard many times; " If you're always looking to be offended, you always will be." Right on, Auntie M, right on. At one of our staff meetings at my volunteer counseling job, I suggested that, at the fundraising banquet that we have coming up, we acknowledge all the mothers in the room who have chosen life (we are a pro-life crisis pregnancy center). Another of the volunteers quickly pipes up, "Well, I don't think that's a good idea at all. It puts people on the spot. And besides, some women can't even get pregnant." Hmmm. I, of course, reply back with "Oh, it all has to be so dang p.c. nowadays, doesn't it?" She fires back, "It's not p.c.! It's just being courteous."

Okay, let me get this straight. I cannot compliment or thank person "A" publicly because there might be someone in the room who can't do what I am complimenting person "A" on, or chose not to do what I am thanking person "A" for doing? Yeah, just wanted to get that straight. Forget it. This topic exhausts me.

So...I took my little brother's senior pictures this past weekend. It was a ton of fun AND I figured out that I am pretty decent photographer! Of course, Kellen was a great subject to work with and laughs so easily that it really was a ton of fun. I just keep adding things to the list of stuff I have been willing to try. Both my mom and my mother-in-law paid me some beautiful compliments about the photos. The sad thing is, while I am proud of myself and excited about this newly discovered ability, I keep thinking about all the things I still can't do. What is that? Why are we so self critical? To keep us humble. To remind us not to take ourselves too seriously, I suppose. My mom and I had a really good talk about this very thing while she was here. We just have to give it to God and know that our perceptions of ourselves are NEVER going to be accurate (which in no way means that we shouldn't treat our bodies as temples of the Holy Spirit, and feed, clothe, and excercise them accordingly! It just means that when looking in the mirror, we might as well be wearing big red clown noses and hula skirts. We are that distorted. )

Oh, an update about our over-commited household; we decided to scale back. We are no longer going to put clothes away, dress the children, feed the dog, or vacuum. Ahhh....that feels so much better. That stuff was really beginning to stress me out.

I can only imagine....

Our Lady of Sorrows. I can only imagine.

What must it have been like, to see your precious son, your first and only child, crucified? Nailed to the cross, bloodied, exhausted, and in complete agony.

I can only imagine.

Teach me grace. Teach me peace. Teach me mercy. Teach me to follow the Lord and His will for me, even when, especially when, I know it will cause me pain. Teach me this self sacrifice.

Thank you, beautiful Mother. We love you.

another quotable

Paxton: (last night, as I am bringing him his beloved, and missing since yesterday, stuffed Pooh Bear) Mom! That's what I'm talking about!

quotable

Me: Paxton, have you seen the baby's nail clippers?

Paxton: Yeah, they're on the counter right there. (Pauses, then with serious a face says) Mom, you can always ask me-- cuz' I know everything.

Oh, okay.

Coming or Going?

I have yet to decide for sure which one applies to this family. I was gone from Thursday to Sunday and Steve left yesterday and will be gone until late Friday night. Our poor children are going to forget Who's on first.

I went to the Oregon Coast last weekend to watch my little sister, whom I just met about two months ago, compete for the title of "Cranberry Queen" (similar to Junior Miss), and to watch my little brother, who I also just met, play in the Cranberry Bowl (highschool football). I also met their mother for the first time. I cannot believe how well it went. I prayed so long and so hard beforehand for grace, to be able to emulate our Blessed Mother. It was surreal to be in 'their' territory. I am so glad I was, though. At the end of the day, all we have is family. That's it. I cannot wait to begin this wonderful adventure of adding members to mine. No matter the circumstances, I am glad to just welcome more family.

Steve left for San Jose yesterday. He flew out of a neighboring town's small airport and volunteered to be "bumped", thereby scoring us TWO FREE TICKETS, roundtrip, to anywhere Alaska flies. We decided to go Boston (or maybe Maine) for our next vacation. Yay! Um, do you think it'll be cold there in late January? Hey, a little snow pack never hurt anybody!

We already booked Noni to come and stay. That will be so nice. I always have to do a little "damage control" after we take a vacation, but it's all worth it. Slumber parties, story telling under blankets with flashlights, dressing up, making cookies, and trips to the dollar store are Noni's games, 'The Spoiler' is her name. They so love it when Noni's here that they are actually disappointed when we come home. Seriously. Now that we have three children, we're going to have to start bringing out the big guns if we want to vacation anywhere other than the trusty fallback 'camping in the backyard'-- pulling sitters into our home instead of packing five people in two different directions. Our babysitting pool just got a lot smaller with the birth of our third.

So, I decided that, since we can't figure out whether we're coming or going, it would be helpful to make a list of all the activities and committees of which we are a part. Are you ready? Me: SAC (school finance), PTO, (school) Auction Decoration Chairperson, Crossroads (volunteer crisis pregnancy center), RCIA, and Book Club/Bible Study. Steve: bi-weekly Bible Study, Fiberactive committee, Committee to elect a local PUD Commissioner, RCIA, and technology maintenance for the school's lab--which has proven to be a bit more demanding than we thought. Then, at a glance, I can see that every. single. weekend. for the next five weeks is full.

So.. something is going to have to give. I just haven't figured out what yet. Maybe the kids?

A blogger friend blogged about a month ago about "doing too much", keeping us away from the home and from taking care of our own families. I have figured out that my activities are the equivalent of having a part time job on top of my full time job as Mom. I need to re-evaluate. I have and always will believe that when you serve others you serve God. We have been blessed financially and been blessed that Steve works from home most of the time. We've been blessed with healthy children and with personal talents that enable us to contribute in great ways. We have been blessed that, for the most part, we are willing to step outside of ourselves and our comfort zones and do something new, if it will be beneficial to others. I really like that about us.

What I don't like? Worrying that we are sacrificing "us" because we are doing too much for others.

There is a balance to be struck. I know that. But first, I need to sign Ella up for dance classes, Paxton for soccer, and myself for piano lessons. Is that too much? Yeah, on second thought, maybe we'll just stick to playing with playdough. They have plenty of time to hone their respective athletic abilities. No rush. I'm still trying to figure out how to throw a ball.

Did he really just say that?

Ella: (loudly whining) I just can't find my shoes anywhere!

Paxton: (playing with blocks in another room) Well, that's not a surpise.

Uh-oh.

The Sahara Desert or my living room?

I really can't tell you which one is hotter.

Our air conditioner broke at about midnight last night. Currently, it is eighty six degrees INSIDE. Whoa. I am developing a whole new appreciation for those that have no air conditioning, or no home at all. Can I still gripe, though?

The baby hasn't stopped crying all afternoon, Paxton has been wearing only underwear and a polyester Bob The Builder dress up shirt for the last hour and my mascara is currently melting off of my eyelashes. I just looked out the window to find Ella riding on her Barbie trike, wearing her princess dress, pink helmet, and Paxton's (size 12) tennis shoes.

Fall, anyone? Autumn? Harvest? Wicked cold nights with wool socks, sweaters and hot cocoa? A girl can dream.

Two kinds of people

Wally, from U-Build-It, this morning:

"There are two kinds of people; those whose homes reflect who they are and what their values are, and those who just want to keep the rain off their asses."

Thank you, and goodnight.

Imaginative play and worldly contributions

For as long as I have been a parent (about 4 1/2 years now), I have thought that imaginative play was important, yes, but certainly not instrumental in character development. I just thought it was a good release from the day to day challenges of constant learning, memorizing, discussing, and then more learning. Oh, no, how wrong I have been.

I had a nice morning with the kids; organizing, laundering, cleaning, and baking blueberry pie. I told the kids that they were free to play with whatever they wanted, but that whatever they did it had to be together and without fighting--no small feat for a precocious almost 3-year-old and a sensitive 4-year-old.

It was beautiful. We made magic wands for Ella's princess costumes and looked all over the house for random items that could be used for 'tools' for Paxton's costumes, including Bob (the Builder) and Thomas ( the Tank Engine). They danced around, fixed things, put sleeping spells on each other and laughed so hard. Together. They laughed together, being amused by each other. It was then that I had a parenting epiphany.

My children need imaginative play for so much more than an outlet. They need it to develop courage, strength, and character. Courage in the face of adversity or despair. Strength to be who they really are, even if everyone around them questions their ability. Character to be able to laugh, to be light-hearted, compassionate, to be a light to those without character. What a beautiful thing to watch them develop those things that make us who we are.

Recently, I have had the opportunity to really contemplate what it is that I want my children to be, my goals for them.

To say that I want my children to be 'team players' sounds so corny. But, it's true. I do. I want them to see someone in need and not think twice about helping them. I want my children to have a sense of humor and be able to laugh together and with us. I want them to be independent and able to take care of their needs when they are older, but I want them to always feel the importance of family, of hugs, of talking and encouragement. I want them to give complements freely and without hesitation and to care about making others feel appreciated. I want them to say 'please', 'thank you', 'excuse me' and 'I'm sorry' like the phrases are going out of style--because excellent manners take you much, much farther in the game of life.

I want my children to love God and want to serve Him and please Him above all others. I want them to pray hard, work hard, laugh hard, learn hard, sleep hard, try hard, love unconditionally and give of themselves, always. That, my friends, is character. Being the best you that you can be.

Imagine the possibilities. Then, play.

Are you sure I am qualified?

St. Rose school started four days ago. Since then, I have been at the school, at naptime everyday, working on getting invitations for our fundraising auction completed.That is on top of my usual Wednesday shift at Crossroads, having my mom visiting overnight, being at a candidate forum one night and having Steve be gone, in Seattle, two of those days.

How do you know you're overcommited? When you find yourself wishing you could get away with allowing your children a "Movie DAY". Not a movie night, or a movie afternoon, but a MOVIE DAY. Usually, Friday nights are 'family movie and pizza night', but today I really wanted a 'pajama, movie, pizza, chocolate cake, latte, silent children day'.

Must. Press. On. Must. Walk. Upright. All. Day.

I love that this is a three-day weekend and I love that a girlfriend and I are going shopping at the outlet malls ALL day tomorrow for school clothes for the kids. Ella isn't in school yet but, like Paxton, she, too, must be the clothing pioneer for the future girls in this family. I have carefully organized and saved ALL of the clothes for each sex into bins and labeled them. Can I tell you how much I love the fact that Steve can go out into the shed tomorrow morning and, because Shepherd is needing 9-12 mo. clothes, look up and see the bin with the corresponding size and grab it? I can then open it up and find AWESOME boys clothes that I haven't seen in, oh, about four years and be totally excited for Shepherd to have a whole 'new' wardrobe. Best of all? It's already paid for. Good thing I don't shop for or buy into 'fads'--else this whole plan of mine might not be so fruitful.

It's a nice weekend coming up. School clothes shopping, bbq's, play time at a friend's pool, Mass, and more work on auction stuff. We are so blessed to have lives that are wonderfully full with so many friends. I may complain about being busy but, at the end of the day, I wouldn't have it any other way. I don't work outside the home, so making sure we spend time with other families is really important to me. I want that to be modeled for my children. I don't have to leave the house every day or 'get a job' to get it, I just need to create it for my family and for myself--conscienciously create it.

So, there are days when I feel almost like Super Mom and there are days when I just wish it could be a Movie Day. Qualified to be a parent? I hope so.

Oh, exterminators came this morning and killed all of the Black Widows that have been mistakenly thinking that our home would be a perfect dwelling place in which they may procreate and become Overcommited Super Moms themselves.

Morning from Heaven.

We got up. Showered. Dressed. It was 6 a.m. and two kids were up.

It is now 8:45 and I am gearing up to go to Crossroads in about an hour. We had breakfast, prayed, did puzzles and have been listening to Catholic Songs for Little Ones all morning. So nice.

I have noticed that, since I have been getting up at 5:30 (with only a couple exceptions), it feels like God's graces are more prevalent in my life. Why is that? I should be more tired and feel MORE worn out, right? Not so. I feel so much more organized and ready for my day--like my vocation is actually worth doing, worth trying, worth loving.

Now, if I could just wean myself off the of the ENTIRE POT OF COFFEE to which I have become addicted. Baby steps, baby steps. Hey, at least it's not Ritalin.

Have I created a Monster?

Ella, as I am tucking her in and saying prayers with her:

"And God bless Noni, so she can feel better, so she can go to the Dollar Store."


(Thank goodness the latter subject in that sentence wasn't "Ann Taylor" or "Starbucks" --else I might really question my parenting.)

Five things I learned today.

1) We are all (for the most part) deluded when we convince ourselves that "organic" produce is in some way better for us.

2) A really cold, half eaten apple soothes a teething baby's gums better than a frozen washcloth.

3) Ella cannot get rid of her hiccoughs for two reasons, 1) She cannot reach them and 2) she is allergic to peanut butter which ALWAYS does the trick for Paxy.

4) During WWII, for training purposes there was such a job as being a "Pull Pilot", which is basically the equivalent of allowing minimally trained officers to point their rifles at you, who are running as fast as you possibly can, pulling some big target which they are supposed to HIT with said rifles. Hmm....I think I'd be out sick that day.

and

5) If you want to build a truly colonial home you must be willing to forego a lot of things that nowadays we would consider critical safety items--ie..a fireplace that is floor level and could fit about four grown men inside. Hmm...I think we'll just have the kids sleep outside.

tailgating at Mama's

Mama Yum Yum's. That is where we ate tonight. Our little family of five went out to eat. It was great! At one point I really had to look around--to look at my family and feel pride.

Then, in an instant, I thought to myself (as Steve would say), "Self, why ARE you all doing so well while eating out? There is peace, you are relaxed, it feels, dare I say, easy. Something must be wrong".


And then? Then I looked at myself and my family. I mean really looked. I have no makeup on and have been wearing the same tank top since yesterday morning. Ella was wearing her patent leather black church shoes, purple capri pants and a hot pink shirt that is about a half a size too small. Her hair was all over with a bright red hair clip that was just barely hanging in there, maybe literally, by a hair. Paxton has had a spider t-shirt and clip-on yellow dress tie on since this morning, and for our dinner out decided to throw on some green and white shorts. Soaking wet sandal's completed the ensemble. Shepherd-- and this is the highlight right here-- started out wearing blue pajama bottoms and a white t-shirt. After sucking on keys ( I know, I know), eating about eight wagon wheel puffs and grabbing for our beers, spring rolls and peanut dipping sauce, his shirt was more of an icky yellow-brown color and his pajama bottoms were caked with soggy, half eaten wagon wheels (I kept wondering where those darn things went. It seemed like he was just eating them so quickly! Little bugger just hasn't quite mastered that hand-eye-mouth thing yet, I guess).

So I did the unthinkable. I did it. Yap. There we were, looking, well, I won't say it yet. We were looking not-so-put-together. I didn't care. I did it. I had to. Steve look on, compelety mortified by what he knew I was about to do. The babies clothes came off... IN THE RESTAURANT. There we were, with our gross selves, dirty kids, beers in hand and....our naked baby. I undressed Shepherd, picked him up, gathered the kids and walked out to the van with...my naked baby. The kid didn't even have shoes on. Just the skin God gave him and a soggy diaper.

Growing up, when I would hear the term 'white trash' I always thought it was referring to a certain class. Oh no. How wrong I was. Now that I am an adult, I realize that all 'white trash' refers to is a certain "look". I do believe, tonight, my family and I embodied the true definition of white trash, right there, inside Mama Yum-Yum's.

You see, you can have class whether you make two hundred dollars a week or two thousand. Whether you live in a mansion or a mobile home, drive a Geo Metro or a Jaguar. It is not what's on the outside at all, rather what we do with ourselves and how we carry ourselves--our presentation.

So, I am going out tonight to move all the cars out into the lawn, flip that big satellite dish that we've been meaning to take the dump over and turn that baby into a gazebo. Then, I'm gonna get me some smoked weenies and pork rinds and have me a cookout. A real tail-gatin' cookout. I'm gonna do Steve real proud, ya'll.

On fire.

Our new priest is amazing. He's on fire. His orthodoxy. His veneration. His attitude. His Shepherding. He is truly what we have been praying for. August 23rd is the feast day of St. Rose of Lima, after whom our parish and precious little school are named. How beautiful. We had an 'all parish' Mass this morning, big potluck afterward and a true sense of communion. Communion, of course, was what the homily was about, so it could not have been more appropriate.

A few months back, I think I blogged about our little school. We put on that Mediterranean dinner because that is what we donated to the fundraiser auction for the school. A friend and I have gone to speak at the Masses a couple times now, encouraging fellow Catholics to send their children to our local catholic elementary school. What happened? God worked through us. Indeed, he worked through us. Enrollment is now up to 87 students! We were down to 55 at the end of last school year.

A little more from St. Rose of Lima:

Our Lord and Savior lifted up his voice and said with incomparable majesty: "Let all men know that grace comes after tribulation. Let them know that without the burden of afflictions it is impossible to reach the height of grace. Let them know that the gifts of grace increase as the struggles increase. Let men take care not to stray and be deceived. This is the only true stairway to paradise, and without the cross they can find no road to climb to heaven."

When I heard these words, a strong force came upon me and seemed to place me in the middle of a street, so that I might say in a loud voice to people of every age, sex and status: "Hear, O people; hear, O nations. I am warning you about the commandment of Christ by using words that came from his own lips: We cannot obtain grace unless we suffer afflictions. We must heap trouble upon trouble to attain a deep participation in the divine nature, the glory of the sons of God and perfect happiness of soul."

"If only mortals would learn how great it is to possess divine grace, how beautiful, how noble, how precious. How many riches it hides within itself, how many joys and delights! No one would complain about his cross or about troubles that may happen to him, if he would come to know the scales on which they are weighed when they are distributed to men."

from the writings of Saint Rose of Lima

We cannot choose the ways in which we will be tested. -Robert J. Sawyer


We went to some friends' house for dinner last night. Our friend was telling us of a missionary friend that they had when they lived back in New Jersey, who had done some mission work in Africa. By the time that missionary had to come back to the states, he had trained himself to eat only a half a sandwich all day until dinner time--because that is all the food that so many people in his area got and to even ask for more would have been disrespectful and thoughtless. Wow. Food for thought. (Pardon the pun). Where is the community in that? Over half of our nation is obese, while there are children starving to death in other areas of the world. Those things are not of God. Gluttony cannot be of God, yet how many of us have been guilty of it at one time or another? I know I have.

Quotes Meme

Quotes that (http://www.quotationspage.com)

(a) reflect who you are
and/or
(b) what you believe.

The random generator spits out 10 quotes at a time, and I took these five.


You can't choose the ways in which you'll be tested.

Robert J. Sawyer, "Calculating God", 2000

(Man, isn't this the truth?)



General principles should not be based on exceptional cases.

Robert J. Sawyer, "Calculating God", 2000

(Like being pro-abortion or pro-life. There is NO grey area, no exception.)



The only way to discover the limits of the possible is to go beyond them into the impossible.

Arthur C. Clarke (1917 - ), "Technology and the Future" (Clarke's second law)

(I keep discovering, over and over again, that just when I start to think something is impossible God speaks to me and tells me otherwise.)



How can you come to know yourself? Never by thinking, always by doing. Try to do your duty, and you'll know right away what you amount to.

Johann Wolfgang von Goethe (1749 - 1832)

(We are too smart. We always want to intelectualize everything and "think it to death", meanwhile our lives are passing us by and we are getting nothing done. Shut up, let go, get up out of your chair and DO. Do, for others, for your family, for God. Stop waiting for it to feel comfortable.)



Dwelling on the negative simply contributes to its power.

Shirley MacLaine (1934 - )

(So true.)

Rotarian ticket taking...and punch.

Steve came home around 11:00 last night after a long day at the fair, taking tickets and being a fill-in. Last night, the first night of the Rodeo, Steve's post was at the Blue Gate. At said Blue Gate, there are many different kinds of people wanting to get into the fair without having to pay; gothic teenagers, aging Hispanic men with many children, none of whom speak a lick of English, scantily clad young women who "just need to get in because they work there", and angry African American men thinking that being asked to present proof of purchase, ie: a ticket, screams racism. Ahh...the joys of having to get into a confrontation with someone over a seven dollar ticket and a green stamp. I loved hearing of the night's adventures.

My personal favorite? Having my husband come into the bedroom, wake me up with a kiss and proceed to tell me all about it, beginning with "So, honey! Your husband got punched in the face tonight!"

I was so proud.

It seems to me that Rotary has a higher than usual expectation of service. Something tells me that he would be kicked out of the club if he punched the kid back. If that isn't discrimination, I don't know what is. Sheesh.

Apparently, that angry teenager on a huffy thought he could peddle right on by Steve and NOT HAVE TO ACCOUNT FOR THAT TICKET. I don't think so. Steve stopped him and a swift punch was delivered. Poor Steve. Poor angry teenager that must not have grown up with a positive male role model and a loving maternal influence.

Pop Tart MeMe

( I don't get the pop tart thing either)

tagged by Michelle

3 Things That Scare Me

Spiders
My children in high places or in the street
Pitbulls

3 People That Make Me Laugh

My Husband
My parents
My kids ( I agree, it's more than three, but how CAN I choose?)

3 Things I Love

Quiet in the morning
Little "I love you's" from little people with little hands giving little hugs
Wintertime

3 Things I Hate

Rudeness
Arrogance
Little obnoxious yappy dogs ( No mom, not Alex. I'm talking CHIHUAHUA'S)

3 Things I Don'’t Understand

Electricity
Car engines
Teletubbies


3 Things On My Floor

The dog ( a big, quiet Golden Labrador Retriever)
The baby's excersaucer
The baby's jumparoo

3 Things I'’m Doing Right Now

Drinking coffee
Hurrying becuase I haven't gotten to the Magnificat yet and the kids will be up ANY SECOND.
Watching the sprinklers. ( It's early, okay?)

3 Things I Want to Do Someday

Take piano lessons again
Learn to rock climb
Run a marathon

3 Things I Can Do

Cook
Muli-task
Change the oil in the car ( IF I HAVE TO)

3 Ways to Describe My Personality

Outgoing
Funny
and umm........HEADSTRONG.


3 Things I Cannot Do

The splits
Swim well
Sing

3 Things I Think You Should Listen To

God's will
Your family members
Dr. Marcellino D'Ambrosio

3 Things I Think You Should Never Listen To

Unproductive gossip (There are times when you can talk about someone if it's to pray for them or to give an update on a condition)
NPR
Michael Moore

3 Absolute Favorite Foods

Aged Cheeses
Dark Chocolate
Fresh fruit

3 Things I'’d Like to Learn More About

Dehydrating and canning
Home building
Homeschooling


3 Beverages I Drink Regularly

Water
Water
Water

3 Shows I Watch

Hmm...yeah, no. No T.V. here. We did order two seasons of Lost on itunes though!

3 Bloggers I Tag:
Everyone that I would tag has already been taggged! Can't wait to hear their responses!

dollar store familiarity

Steve's been at the fair all day today and will be there until late tonight, taking tickets. He is a member of Rotary and they are all "encouraged" to take a shift at the fair. So...my generous husband signed up for THREE, all in one day.

The kids and I are in the process of watching Snow White. I say process because there are usually frequent intermissions when you are watching an hour and half long movie with a four year old and a two year old.

I was just sitting with Paxton a second ago and the following conversation ensued:

Paxton: Mom, did you know I have enough stickers to go to the dollar store now?

Me: Yeah, let's go tomorrow!

Paxton: But, I think that we should go to Grandma and Grandpa's dollar store. ( They live in the next town over)

Me: Why?

Paxton: Cuz I don't know our dollar store very well. I just know Grandma's better. I think that's a good idea, Mom.

So cute.

FREEness

So, we got to Cave B around 4:30ish. It was amazing. So beautiful. So quiet. So perfect.

It's a small resort and winery--only about thirty or so rooms. BUT, each room is more like a suite or studio apartment, complete with hardwood floors, exposed ceiling beams, rustic furnishings, limestone and granite and lots of glass in the bathrooms. The entire backside of each suite overlooks the Columbia River Gorge and Cave B vineyard--it's all glass with two doors so that you can walk out onto your own lawn and patio (covered by trellises and grapevines). It was just so incredibly peaceful. Okay, I'm getting ahead of myself.

So, when we checked in, the receptionist at the front desk said to Steve, "Oh, I see that our manager (that would be the 'Amazingly Fabulous Tiffany') has decided to upgrade you to the Honeymoon Suite, which will be complementary this evening. We are so sorry for your trouble. Also, your dinner, at table #2 (better known as THE BEST TABLE IN THE PLACE!), will be on us this evening, as will your breakfast in bed. What time would you like us to bring that to you in the morning, Sir?"

We giggle like teenagers and stutter a bit, wondering, "Could they be serious?'"

Oh yes, they were.

After we agreed on what time we would like to eat at the finest table in the restaurant for free, we had to decide what time in the morning we would like to be fed a gourmet breakfast in bed for free. Then there was one more decision. What time would we like to go to the free wine tasting session we were given along with our two free wine glasses. Hmmm. Um, NOW? Cuz, it's free.

I realize that with all of this "free" excitement I must sound like a total and complete cheapskate. I promise, I am not. But, it felt so surreal to be in such a beautiful place, enjoying beautiful scenery, tasting amazing wine, eating amazing cuisine, holding my husband's hand, sleeping in, reading, lounging, taking two long baths in a jetted tub, and being able to actually have an adult conversation that wasn't punctuated with phones ringing, disciplining, etiquette training, or hiney-wiping of any kind. I would have paid six hundred dollars for that. We paid nothing. It was Cave B's little gift to the Prentices for --um--being INCONVENIENCED. Man, I wish we could be inconvenienced like that every time we vacation!

All in all, it was one of the best times away with Steve I have had yet. So relaxing. So beautiful. So quiet.

Don't worry. We did some pretty over-the-top tipping, just so we could feel like we were actually giving them something for treating us like ROYALTY. I can't wait to go back! And, we won't even mind if they ask us to pay for it.

Let us honor...

The Assumption into Heaven of the Blessed Virgin Mary
Feast Day: August 15

Young Families

When Jesus died on the cross, he gave his mother to his apostle John. That means that he wanted Mary to treat John as her son, and John to treat Mary as his mother and take care of her. Mary moved into John's home, where he said Mass each day. So Mary was close to her Son in the Blessed Sacrament, even though He had ascended into Heaven.

Mary's love for God and Jesus grew even stronger than it had been when Jesus had been present on earth. She grew more holy every day. People came to visit her, she was kind and patient with everyone. Saint Luke (who wrote the Gospel of Saint Luke) painted a picture of her during this time. The portrait of 'Our Lady of Perpetual Help" which was painted centuries later, used Saint Luke's portrait as a model of what Mary looked like.

Finally when she was very old, it was time for Mary to die. She had enough time to say goodbye to all the apostles before she died. The grieving apostles took her body to a tomb near the one that Jesus was laid in. They covered her with a white shroud and laid her to rest in the tomb.

But Mary's body didn't stay there. Jesus came to her and took her body and soul into heaven to be with Him. Mary was the Immaculate Conception - the only person except Jesus who had been born without the stain of Original Sin,the disobedience of Adam and Eve. God and Jesus would not let the body of the Mother of God decay. This was her reward for her love of God and her years of faithful prayers and suffering.

This is an excerpt from a post on Danielle Bean's blog this morning. We're off to Mass at 9 and then a nice playdate in the park.

I also just found out that FOUR out of 8 of the women in my book club/ bible study are expecting!!! That will make FOUR NEW BABIES in two and a half months. Yay!

Oh, our weekend? Incredible. I will post about it either later today or tomorrow. :)

...or the good news?

So...we were supposed to go to Cave-B tonight for our anniversary. We were supposed to taste wine, have dinner, stay in the cliffhouse suite and wake up to breakfast in bed. We were supposed to leave here in about 45 minutes to drop the kids off at grandma's for the rest of the weekend.

Tiffany from Cave-B called. She called Steve's work phone (thank goodness we were in the house!). Her voice was quivering. She regretted to inform us that they had DOUBLE BOOKED and could not honor our reservation. She felt horrible.

Steve got the news and felt horrible. Almost Ill. All his hard work and the effort he made to do something special, to be romantic, was going to be ruined.

And then.....

The good news. Tiffany felt so badly, that, in an effort to compensate for their error, she offered to upgrade us to the honeymoon suite (the best one they have), give us $100 towards our dinner, offer us a free wine tasting session, and throw in a free breakfast in bed. All this AND an apology that we would have to wait until tomorrow night instead of tonight. Was she kidding?! We needed to be thanking her for giving us an excuse to have a three-day weekend, no stress about having to try to figure out how to coordinate picking up the kids AND making it to Mass in the morning, letting us eat breakfast in bed, and maybe, just maybe, get through an entire morning paper without having to wipe someone else's rear end! God is so good. Tiffany is so good. Cave-B rocks. ( You can check it out online at http://www.cavebdirect.com/. They deserve a plug after this!)

If I weren't married to Steve, I just might ask Tiffany to marry me and stay in the honeymoon suite with me.

Oh, and Steve, happy 6th wedding anniversary. I love you so much. Thank you for sticking with me for six of the most amazing years of my life. You have forever changed the woman that I am and will be. You have given me three amazing children and you have required more of me than any other person I have ever known. Thank you. I love you.

Eleven words

to say to get your children to behave like perfect angels while grocery shopping:

"And if you are really good, we can get some strawberries."


Can I tell you how much I love that?

What's funnier than funny?

Being at the neighborhood ice cream social and having your neighbor, who NEVER waves at you when they drive by, recognize you instantly as "the sweet family that is always waving at us".

You can't make this stuff up. Seriously.

Socials.

Okay, it's been three days and Team Prentice is still going strong. We have been getting up at 5:30, showering, making coffee, reading, praying and tackling our days head on. So, I know three days is only a drop in the bucket but, it's a start. It's a strong start. Steve commented just a bit ago that it seems like we aren't snipping at each other at all with this new schedule. We are both rested and feeling like we have a purpose; our marriage and our respective vocations. I have a feeling that God's hand is in all of it, right down to me playing catch with the kids at 7:00 this morning instead of my usual walking around the house, having other priorities like laundry, cleaning, returning phone calls or finally showering. I am really happy with the way our days have been. Long, but so much better and more positive.

Tonight we are headed to our neighbor's house for a "dessert and ice cream social" for the entire block. Honestly, I'd really prefer a fresh cucumber social or a strawberry and cottage cheese social or even a quiche social. However, they didn't ask me. So, I suppose I will take my brood, my refrigerator log and my lawn chair and shut up. I'll try to choke down a little bit of all the 13 or so desserts and the homemade ice cream. Whoa.

I started using fitday.com to track my calories, activities and goals. It's a wonderful tool that was given to my by my endocrinologist and I am so glad that I started using it. One problem? You have to be rigorously honest about every. single. thing. that goes into your mouth, so you are painfully aware that, by 4:30 you have about five hundred calories left to work with. Hmmm. Five hundred calories? Homemade ice cream and desserts? Well, I guess I'll be taking along one of the kids sippy cups as well then. Maybe just the lid.

On the upside, I am looking forward to directly confronting the eight or nine neighbors that habitually drive right on by our house, every day, never waving back at either my children or me when we are in the front yard. How rude! Okay, so I won't be confronting them but maybe just trying to burn holes into them with my eyes. Or, I guess, better yet, I could try to be nice to them and see if maybe they'll start waving from here on out. Yeah, I suppose that would be the more "christ-like" thing to do. How dull though. Ice cream social just screams cat-fight, don't you think?

The so-darn-cute-I-want-to-chew-on-their-cheeks fruits of my labor

is it naptime yet?

We started our day at 5:30 this morning. Steve and I showered in seperate showers at the same time and came out swinging. Ready to begin our day and ready to do our respective jobs, with clarity, purpose, and peace of mind. We ate, we prayed, we formed a plan. It is now 9:07 and I feel as though I have been awake and ready for the world (and our children) for about 7 hours. I have a feeling that, by 8:30 tonight, we are going to be one tired "Team Prentice".

It feels so good.

Now, on to Danielle Bean....

Happy Birthday, Mama by marriage!

Steve's mom turned 60 today. Sorry, Mrs. Prentice, you've been exposed. :)

We just went to their house for a nice birthday dinner cooked by the Prentice 5. Well, more like the Prentice 2 since Paxton, Ella and Shepherd weren't much help. They were good for filling the cuteness quota I suppose.

This birthday seemed hard for Steve's mom. She kept saying that it felt a lot bigger than turning 50 did. I guess it's all relative. Don't we all have a certain number? That one number that is harder to hit than any other? Why is that? So strange. Regardless of how SHE feels about it, we feel so grateful. I told her that she is finally at the "believable age to be a grandma". It has nothing to do with looks, but something about the 60's says, "I am a grandparent and I have a ton of energy still to give to these little people who are pretty sure that the sun rises and sets on me". I am ready to rest, live, learn, grow, and watch my legacy unfold before my eyes. What's more, she will be so pivotal to who they become as adults by what she models today. They are watching you, Grandma, and they are loving you with every fiber of their being. You better take advantage of the coolness with which you have been bestowed!

Steve and I are really going to try to take charge of this ship. Tonight, before tucking the kids into bed, we read the daily scripture from the magnificat. It felt SO good. On the way home from Grandma's we listened to the luminous mysteries on CD. I keep feeling like we are chasing our tails, like we're on a runaway train. It doesn't have to be like that. I know too much. Steve knows too much. God loves us too much. Our kids need us too much. The resources at our fingertips are too great to keep going unused. It feels good. I think we are officially on the bandwagon.

Pictures are coming, I promise! You'd think that with a husband who is a software engineer that the technology of it all might not horrify me. But, it really does. Shhhh. Please don't tell him. He'd be so ashamed.

the working rebel

I just got back from a long weekend in Spokane with my mom. I was so glad to be able to have Steve's support to go over there. I tried to be really helpful and I just hope that I was. She is recovering slowly but surely. It's so hard to watch your mom be in physical pain, pain that you can't take away. I always figure food helps in times of pain. So, I just made a bunch of soup and sides, helped her walk around, tried not to make her feel like a small child, and tried not to mix up her pills while administering them and accidentally kill her. Joe warned me before I got there that, in an effort to be frugal, my mother, in a medicated fog,"combined" her new prescriptions with the ones that she's had for years. So stubborn. Honestly, I don't know where she gets it. I'm certainly no that way. Not at all. Really. Not at all. Seriously.

While I was there I started reading an excellent book that I ordered. "Guiding Your Catholic Preschooler" by Kathy Pierce and Lori Rowland. SO GOOD. I realized within the first chapter that, thus far, I have been a complete slacker-parent. Sure, I was saying mealtime prayers with the kids, reciting at least one of the prayers in the rosary every day or so, putting crosses and pictures of Jesus in the house, and taking the kids to Mass every Sunday. But all of this is not enough. First of all, somewhere in the fog of just trying to keep the kids alive and crossing my fingers that they'll be polite adults, I forgot that there actually was a PURPOSE. God has a purpose for them to go through adolescence and for me to muddle my way through helping them to reach Him. A purpose for choosing ME to be their mom. Children are like sponges. My job is to lay down my life for them, to be an example by the way that I dress, speak, pray, eat, worship, and learn. Their jobs? To listen and learn. I have been afraid that they were too young for this or that, or that we might alienate some people if we completely dedicate ourselves to the service of others and God. God first, family second, everything else after that. God will always help me to teach and guide my children, His children. The rebel within me doesn't want it to have to so much be work! I guess Jesus did warn us that following Him would not be easy.

Speaking of rebels....our anniversary is in 6 days. Our 6 year wedding anniversary to be exact. And our gift to each other? A new camera!! One that actually takes the picture when you click the button! Not 3 or 4 seconds afterwards! Imagine. It is so nice. It's a Canon Rebel XT with EIGHT MEGAPIXELS!!!! Whoa. We thought we'd have fun with it tonight after I got home. We put it on "sport mode" and it took three pictures in one second. One second. ONE SECOND. Thank you, Steven. I love you!! Photos are what helps us to remember our pasts and I cannot wait to start documenting the kids' pasts.

Book Meme

1. One book that changed your life:

The Road Less Travelled by Scott M. Peck

2. One book that you've read more than once:

The Ya-Ya Sisterhood by Rebecca Wells

3. One book you'd want on a deserted island:

Eating Raw

4. One book that made you laugh:

A Girlfriends Guige to Pregnancy by Vicki Iovine

5. One book that made you cry:

Where The Red Fern Grows by Wilson Rawls ( I know, I'm a sap)

6. One book that you wish had been written:

Women With Hormone Imbalances and The Men Who Love Them

7. One book that you wish had never been written:

Um...since I haven't read it but am so tired of hearing about it....A Million Little Pieces by James Frey

8. One book you're currently reading:

Godless by Ann Coulter

9. One book you've been meaning to read:

Theology of the Body Explained by Christopher West

forgiveness

Me: Ella, come here right now.

Ella: What, mom?

Me: I told you not to play with the hose. What were you just doing?

Ella: But I was just making a river!

Me: Ella, that's not okay and I told you that you weren't allowed to play with the hose.

Ella: Just mommies and daddies can?

Me: Yes. That makes me upset with you.

Ella: Okay, (reaching over to hug me) I forgive you, mom.


I'm sure glad that I have instilled the importance of forgiveness in my children. Discernment, on the other hand...

Age old debate...Working: with pay or without?

On Wednesdays, I volunteer as a counselor at a crisis pregnancy center for three hours or so. I take the kids with me and Shepherd and Ella usually nap for two hours or more while I am there. Paxton entertains himself by coloring, reading, or watching veggie tales movies. I travel thirty minutes there and back since the center is in another town. All in all, the kids and I are usually gone for around five hours. Five hours.

Five hours shouldn't seem like that much. A good friend of mine commented on how difficult it would be to work outside the home, like I do, with more than one child. I hadn't thought about it like that before. I AM working outside the home. I am not getting paid, but I am certainly working. I think until now, I have just been thinking about it as simple volunteering. I guess that, when she said that, what was going through my mind was "I don't work outside the home!" And then, right after that, I thought, "Wow, that was so nice of her to notice that just because I don't get paid doesn't mean that my whole family isn't sacrificing every single Wednesday so that I can help those in need". How validating.

You see, I get home on Wednesday, late afternoon, and feel exhausted. Utterly exhausted. I feel like I have worked 40+ hours. I feel like nothing has been done around my home and I haven't taken care of my own family for SO long. How is that? Since staring to volunteer, I have had feelings of compassion for moms who HAVE to work like I never did before. I judged them. I judged them to be having "different" priorities. "Different" equaling "backwards". No longer do I feel that way. I really don't. I have so many friends who are in that struggle of HAVING to work to provide for their families, of having to make this exhausting juggle every single day. I love them so much and I think of how blessed I am. I am blessed that I don't have to. I am blessed to be able to stay home because Wednesdays exhaust me.

I have been saving this post as a draft for two days now, thinking that it might offend someone or that I shouldn't be THIS honest about how I feel. Ultimately I decided that, like Danielle Bean's post a day ago, this is my space to talk about what I want to, about what is on my mind.

That being said, coincidentally, I had an email from a friend yesterday afternoon after I had already begun this post. It was a friend who works, has been married for a little over a year and doesn't have children yet. This friend has thanked me on numerous occasions for staying at home with my children and not working outside the home. She feels passionately about it and feels that all mothers should stay at home. She even feels that it's a SIN not to. In her email, she asked me if I felt the same way. My answer? I don't know. That judgment is left to God. I DO think that working for the sole motivation of having more money and more material things is sinful, since it is greed and sloth and those are clearly sins. I don't however think that all working mom's are working because they want to wear Estee Lauder makeup and Gucci sunglasses. Some legitimately must work so that their children can eat. I do happen to think that far too many women, however, have convinced themselves that they are in the "must work" category and not the "want to" work category. Pride is also a sin, so if I go any further I am guilty of an equal sin; judgment.

Any thoughts?